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In Honor of Michael Joseph Connors

Created by Michaela And Ryan Connors

Michael Joseph Connors

Irishman Dies from Stubbornness, Whiskey

Michael Joseph Connors died, at age 66, after trying to box his bikini-clad hospice nurse just moments earlier. Ladies man, game slayer, and outlaw, Connors told his last inappropriate joke on Monday, November 13, 2017, that which cannot be printed here. Anyone else fighting stage 4 multiple myeloma cancer would have gone quietly into the night, but Connors was stark naked drinking in a house full of friends and family as Jimi Hendrix and Amy Winehouse played from the speakers. The way he died is just like he lived: he wrote his own rules, he fought authority and he paved his own way. And if you said he couldn't do it, he would make sure he could.

Most people thought he was crazy for quahogging in the Atlantic Ocean in December; for being a skinny Irish street basketball player from Pawtucket, R.I who also was artistically gifted and attended the RI School of Design; for joining the Army during the Vietnam war; dressing up as a priest and then proceeding to get into a fight at Lupo’s Downtown Providence. Many gawked at his ability to draw, paint, sculpt and his record of being banned from 36 pubs from Rhode Island to Estero, Florida. With an intelligent, impish smile, love for the spoken word, irreverent sense of humor, and stunning blue eyes, he could make anyone fall in love with him.

As much as people knew hanging out with him would end in a night in jail or a killer screwdriver hangover, he was the type of man that people would drive 16 hours at the drop of a dime to come see. He lived 1000 years in the 66 calendar years we had with him because he attacked life; he grabbed it by the lapels, kissed it, and swung it back onto the dance floor. At a young age, he would tell his mother, Helen A. Domenici, that he was “the greatest”, just like his idol, Muhammad Ali. At the age of 36 he planned to circumnavigate the world on the Schooner Constellation from Key West- instead, he ended up spending 12 hours on a life raft off the coast of Cuba. In his thirties, he sustained a knife wound after saving a woman from being mugged in New York City. Throughout his life, he was an accomplished artist, cook, shellfisherman and birth control device tester (with some failures, notably Michaela Jo Connors Mare, 41 and Ryan Michael Connors, 38.

He was a rare combination of someone who had a love of life and a firm understanding of what was important - the simplicity of living a life with those you love. He loved to throw pots and spend the night feeding the kiln. His chowder and stuffies were legendary. He could be seen eating raw oysters or littlenecks on the half-shell, with lemon and hot sauce, day or night. He traveled the world seeking perfect avocados for making guacamole. Although he threw some of the most memorable parties during the greater half of a century, he would trade it all for a day at Matunuck Beach with his family, especially his granddaughters, McKenna and Logan. His acute awareness of the importance of a life lived with the ones you love over any material possession was only handicapped by his territorial attachment to the remote control of his large flat-screen tv.
Michael enjoyed cross dressing, a well-made fire, trying exotic foods, charcoal drawing, and mashed potatoes with lots of butter. He was a true fanatic when it came to the Redsox, Celtics and New England Patriots teams. His regrets were few, but include voting third party in the 2016 presidential election, eating sushi from an unmemorable convenience store in Nova Scotia in the summer of 1986, and lending his favorite shucking knife to a stranger while attending Waterfire Providence.
Of all the people he touched, both willing and unwilling, his most proud achievement in life was his children, Michaela and Ryan, who lovingly supported him mentally and physically during their last days together.
Absolut vodka, Simply Orange, and Mack’s Karaoke Cab companies are devastated by the loss of Connors. A "Celebration of Life" will be held during Happy Hour (1 pm) at the old McKenna House on Lincoln Avenue following the 11am funeral Mass being held at St. Teresa’s Church, Newport Avenue, Pawtucket, RI on Saturday December 16th.

In lieu of flowers, please pay his past Rock’s Bar bar tab or donate to Connors' cancer fund at https://tribute.themmrf.org/michaeljconnors

Guest Book

$50

Donations

1. Eugene Domenici
$25.00
2. Michaela Connors